My Twisted Idol

Jessica Zafra is a good writer. Her writing has that satirical, witty note that gives her column a unique zest. She is very unconventional, her writing is unlike any other columnist’s. However, her writing is not recommended for those readers who want pleasant things, as she is twisted. Her writing has a divergent range, unlike her emotions, which are limited.

Jessica Zafra’s hometown is Manila. She attended St. Theresa’s College in Quezon City, Philippine Science High School, and the University of the Philippines, where she majored in Comparative Literature. She is a three-time Palanca Award winner. She is a columnist for TODAY newspaper, but she is currently in a hospital, sick with a neurological disease.

In her columns, she rambles about any topic, but she likes writing about herself the best. Her subjects are wildly divergent. She says it’s postmodern.

My mom has two Twisted books of Jessica Zafra, Twisted and Twisted 7. Jessica Zafra has Twisted books from 1 to 10, and I would like to get them all.

I often fantasize about meeting Jessica Zafra in the hospital. Holding the two books I’d say ” Hi Jessica.” She’d say: ” Who you?” I’d say: ” Just a fan of your books, can you sign them?” She’d sign them afterward and ask: ” How old are you?” I’d say my age, and I know she wouldn’t mind, since she doesn’t believe in censorship (MTRCB) and Parental Advisory stickers.

I know one other Filipino writer, a comic-book writer and illustrator, named Jose Gamboa. We corresponded with each other thru e-mail. I lost one of the library books at my school, which was the work of Jose Gamboa, and we had to ask him for a copy to be delivered to the library. He gave me one copy, signed by him. He also gave me and the library a comic book on Manny Pacquiao.

Jessica Zafra, you are my idol in writing. I wish I could write like you. Please get well soon.

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Baguio After Summer (Part 1)

 

Hi readers. I’m sorry if I haven’t written for a long time. Really sorry.

There are so many things that happened this summer and I’m itching to write them all. First, let’s start with the most recent place we visited, Baguio. It started when our balikbayan relatives got back from Los Angeles to the Philippines. They were Ninong Butch, Ninang Jackie, Nikki, and Joaquin.

Nikki is my favorite cousin, she’s pretty, easy to talk to, and there’s this feeling she triggers which is impossible to describe (no, not the crush thing). Joaquin has a love-hate relationship with me. He loves me a lot (he hugs me all the time and always says I smell good, even when I fart) but I just can’t tolerate his naughtiness that I keep shouting at him all the time. He also needs a haircut.

We had a pleasant time in our dad’s condo in BGC (Bonifacio Global City). We went swimming, went to Mary Grace and other restaurants to eat, and had fun. We woke up at 3:30 a.m. and left the condo to go to Baguio. We picked up Tita AG and Tito Joel somewhere along NLEX and arrived at 8:30 a.m. It was raining when we arrived. Great reminder from Mother Nature that summer season is over. It took 5 hours. Me and Nikki slept for 3 hours in the car. The rest of the time was spent talking, confused that this curvy ear-popping road was Marcos Highway, arguing with Joaquin who was in front of me and Nikki, and telling Nikki the clouds are not snow.

We first went to the BenCab Museum, a place recommended by TripAdvisor. All those stories about Baguio being cold are so true. It was as cold as an air-conditioner’s coldest temperature. We explored all the rooms, and galleries. One room was full of things handmade by the native people called Igorots. The museum is nice, but the cafe was oh so better. The food is great, and their rice is different from the usual white rice. Then, even though we were minors, we entered the Erotica gallery, which was mostly about breasts and naked women. There was even a photo showing love positions. Then, my sister went near something made of wood. She posed beside it, asking for a picture, unaware of what it is.

I intervened.

Me: Gabee! Di mo ba alam ano ‘yan?!? (Do you know what that is?!?)

Gabee: Ano ‘to? (What’s this?)

Me: Tuli ‘yan na pototoy! (It’s a circumcised male organ!)

Laughter erupted from the minors, especially Joaquin, and Tito Joel. You see, Joaquin’s circumcised. Nikki mistook it for a belly. When we got out, the woman at the top said “Kids! Don’t go to the Erotica Gallery!” Too late.

When we all got back to the car, we were talking about what just happened on the way to Camp John Hay The Manor. I told everyone what happened in the gallery. Mom reprimanded me for I was the eldest. I protested, “It wasn’t me! Joaquin closed my eyes and led me in, saying walk, walk.”

Everyone reprimanded Joaquin.

This post is too long, so I will cut it in two parts. The next one will be coming soon. In the meantime, I will (literally)type about other trips and things that happened in summer.

 

Posing in front of the Igorot “bulol” carvings, said to symbolize abundance and fertility.

Eating together at Cafe Sabel, BenCab. It’s very colourful, and the food is great with an awesome view.

Beside my cousin Nikki at the BenCab’s garden.